weekend one: saturday into sunday morning.

school prepares you for a lot of things in life. it teaches you the fundamentals so you can't walk into the world and say "shit, now there's something i didn't know!" it can teach you history from the perspective of the winners, and on a really good day even the losers. what it doesn't teach you is how to process emotions in the face of civil disobedience. it wont teach you how to console those who are hurting, how to find the right words to say. you'll just learn the motions of apathy in order to distance yourself from the center of it all. as you watch, you'll wonder why you weren't the one soul who didn't step in to do something. playing the scenario over and over again will only serve to accumulate more feelings of guilt.
why am i writing this? because pub saftey just tackled and mased a person in the dorm next to mine. because people were crying, lashing out at each other, and i simply didn't know what the fuck to do. i stool there amidst chaos, trying to find a safe place inside, only to hear reality cackling in my ear.